Monthly Archives: December 2011

Big Red Suit

What makes me so approachable? I had an experience at CVS today that is making me reconsider putting pants on before I leave the house.

I needed to drop off and then pick up a few prescriptions. I did not want to leave and then come back so I waited the hour they told me it would be. I did a little shopping and looked at cards. When I finished I still had half an hour so I sat in their waiting area.

There was an old woman who had her stuff on the last remaining chair so I requested she move them. She must have been delighted that another human being spoke to her. As soon as I sat down she began talking and despite a handful of awkward silences, about 20 minutes passed in conversation with her. Here is the general gist of the talk (mostly done by her):

  • Her red coat bought at Burlington Coat Factory.
  • Her head cold that she was getting meds for.
  • Her four cats: names & types.
  • The fact that one of her old cats had been maliciously & repeatedly run over by an “El Salvador” person.
  • Her neighborhood doesn’t speak much English: they all speak Spanish or are black. She’s the only one of the “others” that stayed.
  • Her family in Houston.
  • The fact that she doesn’t fly. Why? The terrorists.
  • Fear of people with turbans on their heads.
  • Fear of leaving the house because her husband was killed by getting hit by a car.
  • Me having a child. When I told her I didn’t want one she continued to let me know I would be so happy with one. I could sing to it or read Bible verses to it daily.
  • Merry Christmas. Don’t fly on Jewish Holidays.

It serves me right for going outside. I was wearing striped capri pants; brown argyle socks; large, rubber boots with fur lining; my black pea coat; and a hat that looks like an owl face (thanks to my sister). I thought my insane look would drive people from talking to me, but I was wrong. Well, I hope I made the crazy, lonely, cat lady happy in some way. I also hope someone tells her that when she wears an outfit that is bright red and sparkly she looks like a giant Christmas ornament.

%d bloggers like this: